We, Voodoo Economics, have been musically documenting the future since the year 2005. The project began when, in a decaying greenhouse in Portland, Oregon, we collectively stumbled upon a manuscript of poetry composed by one René Junot in 2014-2015.

We now know that the wealthy 16-year-old Junot, the daughter of a department-store tycoon, became the voice of a generation when she was captured on camera acknowledging her psychic communication with Meat. The poems chronicle her teenage experience, which was marred by her celebrity. Junot's poetic promise, however, was never fully realized – at age 18, she and fifteen other victims were murdered by her mother, Lydia Junot.

After our discovery of the future artifact, our interest was piqued. We embarked upon a research project in hopes of uncovering exactly how meat gained consciousness and the precise mechanisms by which it expressed itself. The story we unearthed goes deeper than we expected.

As we immersed ourselves in the project, we found that only a migration to Philadelphia, the easternmost major U.S. city after the 2012 iminami, would allow us to uncover the details of the world-shattering mega-tsunami and the ensuing Meat Awakening. We were in the City of Brotherly Love for only a few months when we stumbled upon a palimpsest in a musty corner of the basement of the Free Library written by the scientists at the colony on Enceladus, a moon of Saturn, who left Earth just before the impending iminami. The document details the destruction wrought by the colossal wave:

In 2012, a tremendous iminami struck the southern coast of England and, subsequently, the eastern seaboard of North America, completely laying waste to all structures within thirty-two kilometers of each coastline.

The mega-tsunami was caused by a catastrophic landslide wherein the western half of the volcanic ridge Cumbre Vieja, which lies on the Isla de La Palma off the northwest coast of Africa, broke loose, generating a wave of epic proportions. By far the largest tidal wave on record, it took more lives in one sweep than have been lost at one time at any point in recorded history. Though scientists had warned their respective governments of the potential for catastrophe for thirty years, no government saw fit to adequately fund research to avert the disaster.

Additionally, the text of the Enceladus document offers a meticulous account of the Meat Awakening, the catalyst for which was the unprecedented amount of dead flesh created by the 2012 iminami. The scientists on Enceladus were apparently in communication with a clandestine group of Terric scientists known as RUMMP (Researchers Undertaking to Monitor Meat Psychology) since well before René's famous outburst.

Through rigorous studies and experiments of oft-questionable ethical standards, RUMMP were able to determine the following:

1) Meat operates on a binary date system. It designates the time prior to its mass awakening as the year Null, while it describes all time since as the year One.

2) Contrary to humanity's fears, Meat is a non-violent entity. It thinks of all living creatures simply as gestating Meat. As it has no concept of linear time, it feels no sense of urgency for live flesh to become Meat. Hence, it wishes no harm upon the kingdom Animalia.

3) Meat is a singular consciousness composed of and shared by all dead flesh.

4) That consciousness is able to communicate telepathically with all living entities within a close proximity to Meat. In human subjects that are least receptive to telepathic communication, the symptoms of Meatspeak resemble hypnagogic hallucinations such as exploding head syndrome and sleep paralysis. These subjects have become increasingly disturbed, frequently exhibiting violent and irrational behavior.

We have now reached a pause in our research. To uncover more could be devastating to our already-tenuous mental health. If anyone has any information on the happenings described heretofore, however, we are dreadfully curious to know what happens next.